weightfighter

I had my one month check up since I started this journey. I have lost 19 pounds, let alone the number of inches. This was one of the best days of my life. I do need to work on exercising more and eating more veggies with my meals, but over all I am doing well. My blood pressure, which is always high, thus the blood pressure medicine, was initially 110/70. They took it three more times and could not get the pressure higher then 116/72. How cool is that! Last year when I lost 20 pounds, but blood pressure had not improved nearly as much (maybe only a few points). I was trying to figure out the difference because last year I was exercising more. Greta talked to me about the fact that not only was I still eating poorly (portions too big and misaligned); I was also drinking the same beverages. I would have my morning coffee. If I wanted coffee later on in the day, I would just have it. I am not one to pay endless dollars for specialty coffees so those really were only a rarity. But I would drink diet or sugar free drinks such as Diet Coke, Tropicana Light Orange Aid. Many of these drinks contain sodium, even just a little bit. Based on the research I have since done, apparently the salt or sodium causes the body to keep more water in the body and thus the blood and blood vessels to wash out the excess sodium. By drinking my 8-8ounces of water a day, drinking 2 ounces of water for every 1 ounce of caffeine, and changing my diet so drastically where the sodium intake is greatly reduced, I have reduced the amount of sodium in my blood. I look forward to next month when I can see if the pressure is still low. If it is, I am going to talk to Greta about doing a daily blood pressure check without my medicine for the month and see if the pressure remains low

The week of insanity is over and done with, thank GOD! While there are still some concerns in the building (I work in residence life at a university) with illnesses and so forth, one thing I have noticed is that I am finding healthier ways of dealing with emotional and physical stress. My first instinct is no longer to head for comfort foods such as chocolates and so forth. I have also noticed that my cravings have changed. The dependency on chocolate and even coffee is not as bad. When I do have these cravings, I can satisfy them with smaller amounts of the item or healthier alternatives. This week I did have a total of three cups of Yum-Yum’s homemade ice cream (in three different settings). There ice cream is so good, I absolutely love it. Rich, smooth, creamy and completely bad for you. But I make sure that I count those calories. In addition, when we use to go there, I would have a large cup of ice cream (I mean why not, it was only 1.70 more then the small…) and eat the entire thing. The large serving held three to four cups of ice cream in it alone. If I ate that once a day, three times a week… lets just acknowledge that there is no wonder why I started out at 272.

Because of the hectic schedule of this week, I did not make it to the gym. I was so exhausted each night when I got home (not counting Monday, but that night I was finishing up my homework that I could not finish because I was working most of last weekend). I know I need to work on going to gym and class more often.

This week is crazy and insane at work. I am not able to cook or eat at home like I normally would. Today I did horribly. I ate 1100 calories at lunch today. I cannot do that, but baked beans were too good to give it up. It was a weakness. Even though I knew I did not know the calories, I still ordered it.Clearly, I cannot go to that restuarant regularly!

I have not written in the diary much this week. The week has gone smoothly overall, but I have had emotional and stressful moments as work where I have struggled to deal with my emotions in other ways then eating. This is huge challenge. I have had to look at myself, how I respond to stress and emotions, how I handle every day situations. It has been an eye opening experience that I am sure I am not done with. My mood is very depressed at points, where other people including my staff and co-workers can see that I am sad. My visible emotions create an almost paradox as I hate to show my “bad” emotions to others. For me, it makes it seems I am weak and not in control of myself and I hate that feeling. I am working through it, but I still have desires to eat foods that are not good for me when I am not feeling well.

Yesterday I went to Carowinds with my sister and youngest niece. I did not eat horribly, but I also did not eat well. I did have around my calorie count. I did not have enough water. Today I woke up with headaches, cravings, and withdrawal symptoms. I have fought these symptoms all day. In addition, I woke up too late to take my appetite suppressant, so I am starving along with the cravings. It is frustrating, but I also know it is a matter of getting back into a pattern. Getting back on that bike and that is what I am doing.

Here is a recipe I made for dinner:

Vegetable Sautee For Tonight’s Dinner

½ Tablespoon Olive Oil – 60 Cal

3 Crushed Garlic Cloves – 5 Cal

1 Large Zucchini – 52 Cal

2 Med-Large Yellow Squash – 104 Cal

½ Large Red Onion – 52 Cal

½ Cups Green Beans – 90 Cal

            Total: 363 For 4 Servings

            Calories/Serving (1 Cup) = 92

Today was a much better day. I did not have to fight urges such as emotional eating. I tried the “Cook Yourself Thin” Zucchini Spaghetti recipe (using the zucchini verses the noodles) and then did the Pizza sauce from the same cook book as the sauce. It was awesome and Jay loved the sauce. I made him noodles, but still as least we could cook similar food without.

Today was a bad day emotionally. Little things were setting me off. During the afternoon, I was extremely upset about some events of the day and hungry because of the insanity that became my lunch. I chose a Nutter Butter Bar for a snack after looking at my calorie count. I was originally going to eat both bars, but as I was eating the second bar, I realized that I was not eating just for hunger, but for emotions. I threw the second half of the second Nutter Butter Bar out. It was a difficult realization. I knew I ate to satisfy emotions, but not to the extent that I actually did. Food is my comfort when I am bored, upset, sad, anger, everything! During the rest of the night, I fought the urge to eat more junk food as I grew more restless and irritated as I was not satisfying the urge that I was use to satisfying in the past.

I did eat out with co-workers today, but I made sure to keep the meal below 500 (405 to be exact). Then for dinner, I did the Cook Yourself Thin Pizza. I used Turkey sausage instead of chicken sausage, which saved a few calories. The entire pizza was only 475 calories. I did not have as many veggies as I should have for dinner, but I still had red peppers and doubled up on my veggies with lunch.

I am currently looking up information about restaurants nutritional values. I have found some information through National Association of Restaurants. I am glad to see that there is federal legislation in congress currently to require restaurants to post nutritional information.

I went through and created a menu for this week. Hopefully I will stick to it. The evening was rough. I thought I was over the cravings, but I was not. I struggled not to eat a second 100 calorie Klondike bar. It was extremely difficult. I could not fall asleep for two hours as I fought the craving.

Jay and I ate Outback To-Go. I am extremely disappointed that the government does not require the restaurants to at least post their nutrition facts on a website. It made it very difficult for me to pick foods. The good news, there was a website I found through Google that did offer some good information. I used this information as approximations. I picked the 6 ounce Outback Special with the seasoning and the salad and steamed veggies for my sides. I ordered nothing to be cooked with butter. In addition, for the dressing, I used vinegar and olive oil. I only ate 1/3 of the steak (with the apatite suppressant, I can not eat much more then that. As it was, I had to eat my salad later).

Overall, I only ate approximately 1263 calories. Considering the fact that I did not do a lot of activity today, I was not concerned. Overall, this week has had its ups and downs. I worked through the sugar withdrawals. I also learned that moderation is ok. I can have a 100 Calorie ice cream sandwich at night so long as I have those calories in my day. I can also eat food that has taste! It is a different way of preparing the food. I think this coming week, I will work on planning meals ahead of time (instead of eating the SAME thing for lunch and dinner for three straight days) and find two new low-calorie recipes to try next week.